North Korea’s U.S. Travelogue

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Check out this video, allegedly being broadcast across North Korea about life in the United States.

All 315 million Americans are apparently homeless in North Korea’s United States. They spend all their time melting snow for coffee, and killing local birds for food. They are penniless drug addicts who appreciate handouts from — wait for it — the government of North Korea.

It’s hard to know which is more bizarre: the incredibly bad video, or the fact that this is a nation the U.S. fears like no other. More critically, if this is the real deal, it goes to show just how isolated the average North Korean is.

But there’s just one problem: if the U.S. is as enfeebled and desperate as it appears here, no way can it help South Korea wage war against the North, even as the two allies are amid a 13,000-troop-strong war game that has driven the North Korean leadership to unprecedented levels of war fever.

Pass the bird, please.